Get behind me critics

I'm listening to the White Stripes' Get Behind Me Satan and liking it more and more. Remember the kind of WTF response it received from much of the press? "Why is this so different? What's with all these weird instruments? Where is 'Seven Nation Army, Part 2: Eight Nation Army'?"

On the same day GBMS was released, Coldplay (a band I don't like) put out X&Y. The big critical response to this was "Boy, they just keep putting out the same record!" How do these assholes hold onto their jobs? Oh yeah, because they accept promotional copies as payment. And not a lot is expected from them:

"Hey junior, c'mere a minute. I'd like you to review a couple of records for us."

"Sure thing, boss. What have you got for me?"

"The new White Stripes and Coldplay albums. Have you heard them?"

"You bet! Get Behind Me Satan is different from their last one, which I liked. It sucks! And then X&Y is the same as their last one, which I liked. It sucks!"

"Great work. Now get me a chicken cutlet, you fucking maggot."